Getting a divorce.

[Manifestjp]

Hey guys. Sorry I haven't been around for a while. Been going through tough times with the wife. Out of nowhere she says she doesn't love me and she wants a devorce. I'm really wrecked over this. Guess I'm just reaching out. Hope this isn't against forum rules but I've talked to a lot of you personally and think of you all as distant friends. Has anyone here gone through this before?

[mattangel]

Glad to see you back in the forums, Justin. Unfortunately, I hate that it's under these circumstances. I wish that I had something more than my utmost support and sympathy for you, but God knows that I'm not one to give advice on these matters. I'm a kindred spirit and struggling as well. I peaked in on Facebook, and it is clear that there is still a lot of love in you. With that alone, I honestly believe that any problem can be worked out. If there's anything I can do for you, please let me know, and by all means, please don't hesitate to find support in these forums. We're all family here and we know that there are more important things than puzzles.

Keep smiling and hang in there buddy. We're thinking about you.

[Sejanus]

While I haven't been through a divorce I did have a fiance leave me so I know how much that hurts.

Not sure how much it will help but try to find a hobby to get your mind on other things so you don't dwell. That is what I did and it took me awhile to 'get out of it' so to speak.

It is no fun I am sure.. sorry you have to go through it.

I am sure the people you know here can offer better advice and support than I, but still hang in there!

[smiteo]

I can only imagine how you must feel...
Sorry for what you are going through!

You definitely have friends here! And we're here for you...

-Derek

[Manifestjp]

Thanks guys! you have no idea how much that means to me. It's just really hard when you've invested all your heart and soul in someone only to not have the same given to you. I've been trying to stay strong and have been going to therapy to try and work through this but how to be strong is a problem for me when I've given her everything. All I can hope for now is a miracle. And if your listening Chris please get those golds out! I could use a little distraction right about now.

[maztec]

Divorce is hard. Depending on how far into it you are totally affects any advice someone can give you.

Things to remember. Believe in yourself, be strong, and life will be good again.

Things to ask - How can you be better next time? How can you choose better? Where did things go wrong?

Things not to do - Blame yourself or blame her. Relationships are a mutual effort, not something either of you can do on your own. (I have a friend who just finished going through a divorce, but in probably a far worse way.)

Things to do - If the divorce is not finalized, take her to couple's counseling. There is a cooling off period in most states, which is a good time for the two of you to explore what is going on and decide if this is something temporary or something that can be worked out. If you're bigger than when you first met her, do both of yourselves a favor and start working out .

Right, not sure how helpful I am. I'm more often in the third person position on these things and hopefully never have to do this in the first person, but we feel for you.

And all else fails, keep busy, stay around friends, don't hide, and live your life. Hiding behind a gold revomaze won't solve your problems.

[Gdamatov77]

Unfortunately Manifest I can't offer anything except for some friendly support. I am only 19 and have never been in a relationship so I do not know anything about them. But if I were to give advice, I say, stay positive, and if it was meant to happen, let it happen the way it will.

Good luck to you, and the best of luck from your friend,

Gabriel Damatov

[mhuti]

Don't isolate yourself and move on as quickly as possible. Maztec has the right of it people and circumstances change, the boundaries between who is right and and who is wrong become meaningless. If there is no reconciliation just let go. Short-term, things will feel bad. Long-term you'll be a stronger and better person. There is no easy or quick fix...
Don't isolate yourself... this is important!

[Mark76]

The reason I bought my first Revomaze was because I wanted something to take my mind off breaking up with my girlfiend. I know it was not on a level with what your going through, we all feel for you. Best advice I was given...... Just take one day at a time.

[Barcared]

Hi Justin. A lot of us have been through what you are going through at the moment (me included). You have friends here who will listen to you at any time and lend a sympathetic ear.

It is good to share with others rather than bottle it up and it's a question of time and slowly healing. Keep busy and occupied as the worst thing to do is isolate yourself and wallow in negative thoughts. Other than that keep your chin up and our thoughts are with you.